Are You Addicted To: Comparing Yourself to Others?

We have all done it at one point or another- compare ourself to others of course.

While, in many instances it seems it could ignite the 'competitor' in us, for the most part it is actually a disabling mechanism.

 There is always someone more successful, wealthy, healthy and etc. that we could compare ourself to, but what I have found in recent years is that even the person that seems to have it all, is lacking stability in one or more aspects of their life.

Comparing myself to others is almost second nature to me. From work, school to physical appearance and personal relationships, it becomes very easy to lose oneself in the realm of 'only if I had.....' or 'why don't I have....', and as personal experience takes it, there is nothing more detrimental then having the self-deteriorating prophecy that despite what you have or achieved that you somehow are not good enough.

So how do we try to overcome it?

When you find yourself belittling yourself or your accomplishments, take a moment to send gratitude for everything you DO have. This action instantly changes the mindset and refocuses your energy, breaking the pattern of comparison.

Try it today; write a list of 5-7 things in your life that you are truly grateful for or should be grateful for, but may not always focus on. Example: a supportive family/partner, a healthy body, great communication/listening skills, ability to speak different languages, a hidden talent. Any little thing that you are grateful for will remind you that you are your own individual, and you have your own unique path life.

February Challenge: Overcoming TV addiction

So about 27 days ago, I made a pledge to myself that I would overcome my TV/TV show addiction. In the beginning it was extremely difficult because I haven't realized how much of day's routine revolved around my addiction. But, I am proud to say that almost a month into it, and I no longer feel like I am disabled my need to 'watch something'. 

I have filled my day with so much productive work, that I lost the needed time to write about it on my blog. Don't get me wrong, I still watch TV/TV show, but no more than an hour/day. For the most part I preplanned what I am going to watch and if I spontaneously found myself in front of the TV, I made sure I get up and leave or turn off the tv after an hour. 

But, overall it was a good experience and I am very happy about the end result... Now, with less than a week to go, I am already eager to see what first-world addiction I want to overcome in the Month of March. 

Daily Solutions: Want a better job?

A Job is Similar to a Relationship,

IF YOU SETTLE FOR LESS, YOU WILL GET LESS THAN WHAT YOU SETTLED FOR.

Image from: www.unionrestoration.org

Solution:

1) Once You Get Hired in Any Company:
- Don't be afraid to keep an eye out for other positions, both internally and in other companies. 
- Get to know people in the office. Everyone from the receptionist to upper management could play a crucial role in your future in the company.

2) Want to Change Your Career?
- Thoroughly research what it is you actually want to do. You may require specific training or certification before you could actually apply for appropriate positions. 
- Don't be afraid to start networking with people in the field. There is nothing more valuable than hearing the insights from an insider.
- Incorporate your current skills (even if unrelated) to the new position. You have the potential to offer a company something that other candidates will not be able to. 

3) ASK:
- You will never get a promotion or a raise if you don't ask for it. If you are like most of us, it could be a little daunting asking for such things from your boss. Therefore, believe in what you are asking for. Think why you deserve the raise or promotion and use those reasons in your proposal.

4) Follow Change:
- In order to stay relevant, you need to welcome change. 
- Stay well informed regarding new innovations and research in your field and try to implement it in your work. If necessary, make appropriate recommendations to upper management. 


Remember, there is something valuable in the phrase 'Do What You Love, and Love What You Do' .

Daily Solutions: Want to increase your productivity? 
Daily Solutions: Want to reduce the negative thoughts that lead to anxiety?

Are You Addicted To: Valentine's Day?

Attention! Attention!

Love is for Sale

In the spirit of Valentine's Day tomorrow, I thought it would deem appropriate if talk a little about love.
 
We are all brutally aware (or at least I hope we are) that once a month or so we are faced with societal pressure to spend money. In the end of the day, all we are is consumers.

But, from all the Hallmark holidays that we have to endure, none bothers me more than Valentine's Day.

Love, the single most used and abused word in the English language, is up for sale once a year on February 14th. Yet, unlike other merchandise, you can't purchase this commodity for yourself. 

I remember it was back in grade school when this shenanigans was embedded in our brain, when we were able to send each other 'Secret Valentine' and for those 10 daunting minutes when the teacher was handing them out, I, along with the rest of the class would hold my breath, praying for at least one Secret Valentine, in order to avoid the embarrassing, pity filled moment when we had to sit there with an empty desk. Since grade school days, red paper hearts have turned into little fancy boxes, Cinnamon Hearts into diamond earrings and .... you get the picture. But, besides the value of the gifts, the concept is very much the same. 

   So what I am getting at is that despite living in the 'progressive' 21 Century, once a year we are taken back to our barbaric ways where single women are penalized, love is commodified, and our worthiness is left in the hands of someone, who may or may not reciprocate our "love". Here, love simply refers to the value of time and money we have spent on our partners gift, in comparison to what we are receiving. If you ask me, this sounds more of a business transaction, then a companionship. 
    
    Worst of all, we voluntarily and continuously subjectify ourselves to this growing culture, which reduces affection and intimacy to a teeny tiny racy lingerie and little boxes with big price tags. How? By paying 4x the amount for dozen of roses, reserving a pretentious restaurant with a set menu , watching a sappy Hollywood movie cleverly titled 'Valentine's Day', and expecting a gift to magically fill a bigger void in our relationships. 
   
   Call me a romantic, but what ever happened to year-round romantic gestures, love without expectations, and being alone without seeming lonely? 

Daily Solutions: Increase Productivity? No Problem.

If you are anything like I used to be, once you get home from work (5pm-6pm) you are ready to become a couch potato. It seems being productive after a 'work day' is more improbable than waking up at 5am to make it to the gym; Seems like a good idea at first but it is too good to be true.

But, imagine if you could utilize that extra 4-5 hours before getting ready for bed. What would you get done (or start) if you had that time?

The following few tricks have really helped me, and I hope it could help you too.

Image from: marketinggypsy.com

1) Turn off your TV/Background Noise
Since I have made a vow to overcome my TV addiction 12 days ago, I have so much extra time, I actually run out of things to do. In only 12 days, I have started this blog, created several other social media accounts that I contribute to regularly, written several drafts for future posts, organized my projects, updated my portfolio and learned a few new recipes in the kitchen.

2) Join a team
When I received an E-mail from a friend in December asking if I wanted to join a dodgeball team,  I thought she was bloody absurd. But, since committing to the team every Tuesday night, along with the rest of regular commitments, I find that the rest of my week seems more organized as well because the more I have to do, the less spare time I have to waste.

3) Schedule in Social Gatherings and 'Me-Time'
I don't use a fancy calender with a leather cover or a high-tech tablet (not that there is anything wrong with that) to organize my week.  What I use is a simple notebook that I have turned into a weekly calender. Besides deadlines, meetings, and important reminders, I also schedule in my social life. When I see how much of my week is actually accounted for, I am more likely to utilize that extra few hours that I have each night. This does not mean that I am not flexible or pass on opportunities, to the contrary, I am quite spontaneous because I see what needs to be done, and I make the conscious decision to either commit to the task at hand or reschedule.

4) Listen to Your Body and not the Devil on Your Shoulder
There is going to be days that no matter how much you would want to be productive, you are better off kicking your shoes and having a glass of wine. Do it. You need it! Your body and mind requires occasional 'time-off' in order not to burn out. But, differentiate between  'I need to unwind' (voice of reason) and 'I should really do work, but I rather do it tomorrow' (the devil on your shoulder).

5) Set Goals
Last but not least, set weekly goals. Yes, it seems redundant but setting goals helps with the direction of your week, works as a motivation factor and it is a tangible way to measure progress.

Love you hear your feedback.
Comment here or twit me at @solutionaddict

Are You Addicted to: diets?

Here it is: I have never been considered skinny.

And, since I could remember I have either been on a diet, finished a diet, failed on a diet, or thought I really need try that new diet.

This is not a unique tale, and I am certainly not the first person to write about it. We are all aware of the role that media plays in presenting the 'ideal', and we all seem to be experts in criticizing the fashion industry and ad campaigns for planting the 'skinny seed' in our brain. 

Yet, North Americans spend close to $40 BILLION/Year on weight-loss programs and regimens. I am not going to lie, I have contributed a hefty amount to this total as well. 

We also have the crazy Cabbage Soup Diet, 3 day Military Diet, Master Cleanse, Baby Food diet and so on and so forth that could easily be found on the internet. But, we know that they don't work, if they did, we would all be skinny. The only thing they do is reduce the water weight for a few days giving you the illusion that you have lost weight. I would know; I have tried a number of them. 

If I spend half the time following a healthy lifestyle that I do following new fad diets, I would maintain a healthy weight. But, the problem is, it seems that I have been engineered to only respond to quick results. Or the truth is, I am addicted to diets. There is a rush I get when I start a new diet because I think 'this might just be it'; this could be the formula to becoming the 'skinny image' that I have in my mind.

And, like any other addict, when I hear someone talk about a new diet and its supposed results, I get excited and become anxious to try it.

But, I am sure I am not alone. If the diet industry is as successful as it is, there are a few 100 (thousand) addicts like myself out there struggling with this addiction, unequipped with any real information about how to overcome it. And, NO, simply telling someone to change their mindset towards diets and body image is not a feasible, realistic solution.

If someone out there has a real solution to overcoming diet addiction, I would love to hear from you, but until then...

 the real question remains: 

Are You Addicted to Dieting?

Image from: www.bcliving.ca

            

Are You Addicted to: Coffee?

I am neither a scientist, nor a psychologist. Not a nutritionist, doctor or a counselor. But, I know an addict when it is having a nervous break down behind me while waiting to buy her coffee. 

I usually buy my morning coffee from the drive-tru, but today while looking at the endless line, I decided to park and go in. Bad idea.

I was not aware that "I haven't had my coffee yet" has become a socially acceptable excuse to act like a lunatic. While, I admit that the line up was long, and the number of staff low, a lady clearly in need of her morning coffee managed to further frustrate others in line by cursing at the workers, loudly scream over the phone to someone who seemed to be her contractor, and wrongfully accuse another woman for budding in line.

As I was waiting for my order to get ready, I overheard her explain to the cashier that she was sorry for the commotion, and smiled while saying "...you know how it is, I haven't had my coffee yet".

Are you kidding me?  

If being unable to control your behavior or social responses due to the lack of a substance, i.e. caffeine, is not an addiction, I don't know what is.

The only difference is that her substance addiction is socially acceptable, and economically motivated by coffee chains that always seem to find a new neighborhood corner to pop up in.

So, now the real question:  

Are You Addicted to Coffee? 

 There are a hundred reasons (health, psychological, economical, etc) to control your caffeine addiction. But beside all else, do it for the sanity of those that have to be around you in the morning.

Image from www.coffee-addiction.com.au